What to Know About Dating and Schizophrenia
Most of us desire the love and companionship that come with a romantic relationship. However, having a serious mental illness like schizophrenia can make it harder to build close connections. Here is a closer look at how the illness affects dating and how to manage challenges along the way.
How schizophrenia can impact your relationships
Schizophrenia is a mental disorder that triggers problems with thinking, behavior, and emotions. There may be times when you feel OK, but then your symptoms can get worse without warning. It is also possible that your symptoms are a constant presence in your life.1
Some symptoms of schizophrenia can significantly impact your relationships, including romantic ones. Symptoms of schizophrenia that can affect your dating life include:1,2
- Ignoring your personal hygiene
- Seeming to lack emotion (a lack of eye contact or facial expressions and speaking in a monotone voice)
- Loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed
- Not being able to feel pleasure
- Cutting off contact with friends and family
- Loss of romantic interest
- Trouble creating and keeping relationships
There is a stereotype that people with schizophrenia cannot experience or express love. People living with the condition explain that they desire relationships and the ability to show their emotions, but schizophrenia stops them from fully doing so.2
Supporting a partner with schizophrenia
Schizophrenia is a lifelong illness. You and your partner will both learn to cope with it. Here are some ways you can support your partner and take care of yourself:1
- Educate yourself. Learning all you can about schizophrenia will make you a more compassionate partner and knowledgeable about a complex illness.
- Help your partner stick to their treatment goals. There are no quick fixes when it comes to managing schizophrenia. Your partner will need help remembering their treatment goals and staying encouraged to stick with them long-term.
- Help find social services. Living with schizophrenia means the person will most likely need some support with daily living. There are programs to help people with the condition with jobs, housing, and other types of support. Ask about these types of services on your partner’s behalf if necessary.
- Remember self-care. While supporting your partner, remember to also take care of yourself. Meditation, yoga, and tai chi can help to ease stress. Also, consider joining a support group for friends and family members of people living with a mental illness. It can be helpful to talk to those on a similar path as you.
How to discuss your schizophrenia diagnosis with a partner
If you are the one living with schizophrenia, you may eventually want to talk about your condition with someone you are dating. It can be hard to know the right time and what to say. Here are some ideas:3,4
- Get to know the person you are dating. Give it time before telling them about your illness. You may want to figure out first whether this is someone you are serious about. And you will learn if they are likely to be kind and supportive about mental health issues.
- Talk to them at the right time. Wait to have the conversation about your condition when your symptoms are under control. You can say something like, “I want to share something important about myself. I hope you will listen and be understanding.”
- Only share what makes you comfortable. You may be ready for full disclosure or to only share some information. It is about your comfort level and what you are ready to share. Listen to your gut and try not to let other people pressure you into disclosing your condition before you are prepared.