Medication Management: Don't Lose Hope

For over 3 years, my doctor and I tweaked my medications. I thought my primary concern was the depression. However, my diagnosis is schizoaffective disorder that is schizophrenia coupled with bipolar disorder and depression. Therefore, we must be careful with the medication cocktails to reduce poor medication reactions and to effectively tackle certain symptoms.

One of my worst symptoms: lack of motivation

My lack of energy, motivation, concentration, and flatness were a beast that many times overpowered me in vicious cycles. My weeks of low moods became seasons and then the seasons became years.

Once I was on two antipsychotics, two antidepressants, a medication for anxiety, and mood stabilizer to control my being stuck and low. While many of my schizophrenia symptoms were under control my depression and the negative symptoms were not.

Medication management with schizophrenia

We'd tweak the dosage often. Initially, I felt my symptoms go away whenever we tried something new but only for symptoms to gradually return and reside. They'd sneak in through the back door and drain me.

The vicious cycle looked like adding a medication, changing a medication, adjusting a medication, and then starting the process all over again. How long did we try each of these medications? The timeframe varied because they initially worked but then its effectiveness would fade off.

Self-care through difficult med changes

Despite many doctor visits, I kept hope alive for better days. Actually, my family kept me motivated. Checking on me regularly. Our communication was frequent. We encouraged each other. Some days were terrible, with my low moods and energy. Taking two naps daily plus my required excessive 10+ hours of sleep at night.

I endured the days by following strict self-care routines. They included exercising, meditation, journaling, listening to inspirational speakers, and therapy. While staying accountable to my medication regimen. I performed a series of healthy rituals to feel better but the symptoms wouldn't let up.

Finding the right medications was hard

My medication journey was a trek up a high mountain. The hike was gruesome. At times, I was desperate for relief. Frustrated at the process of having to fight all the time only to get the recurring poor results that wavered like a steep rollercoaster ride. After being chained to my bed, I wanted to give up. Fortunately, my family and friends inspired me to keep pressing forward.

Finally, I feel better. Now I don't have to jump through hoops in self-care rituals in order to have a good day. I'm on the right medication cocktail.

Letting my doctor lead the way

I learned from experience that it is better to avoid identifying conditions. Instead, I describe my symptoms and allow the doctor to be the doctor.

Because we learned that my signs of depression may have actually been schizophrenia's negative symptoms. Based on the final medication adjustments to changing the antipsychotics opposed to only the antidepressants.

There's hope with schizophrenia

Therefore, if you're struggling to find the right medications don't lose hope. Keep trying. Stay connected with your caregiver and loved ones. Hold open conversations with your doctor on your symptoms and how the medication makes you feel.

Remember, living with a diagnosis is tough but you're resilient with your treatment team, caregiver, and supporters.